March 21, 2007
my soul is exceedingly sorrowful -II
This is the fifth day after the car accident. I am slowly recovering from the pain and frustration I feel inside my heart. I'm so glad to have such good families and friends. My dad came all the way from Johor to KL to check on me, of course the car as well. He didn't even scold me for being involved in the accident. But he didn't say a lot of words of comfort to me as well, typical dad, cares about you, but it's just too hard for him to express his feeling. My dad said just let him settle everything, including the summon I have to pay and some insurance procedure. My mum kept on calling me for the past few days to comfort me, to console me, to tell me that everything is ok now. She told me to forget what had happened, but I just couldn't. It still hurts whenever I think of the accident and the bitter experience. My sister came to find me and brought me to McD and listen to me. While my brother who seldom calls me, called me on the day after the accident to ask about my condition. I am so glad to have them. My pastors did call me as well. They asked me about the whole accident and how am I, listened to me, consoled me and gave me loads of support. While some of my coursemates kept on doing something to cheer me up, supporting me, standing by my side. After the whole accident, finally, I realised who are being sincere to me and who are not. All in all, I bought a big lesson from this accident.
March 18, 2007
my soul is exceedingly sorrowful
Something big happened on me last night. I had an accident. I am still not sure whether the malay guy is wrong or it is I who breach the rules. After the accident, my brain was in a total blur. I couldn't think rationally or logically. I made my first call to my sister to ask for advice and help. After a few moments of conversation with my sister, finally I was back, i.e .I could think of what to do next and handled the whole situation quite well, I supposed.
When the malay guys approached me, I was quite panic and tried my best to negotiate with them (I only lowered down the window beside the driver's seat). They demanded me to get out of the car. But I insisted to stay in my car. They kept on ordering me to get out of my car and I insisted to stay in the car. This is some part of our conversation:
Malay Guy and his friend : m
Me: s
My friend who was in the car with me: a
m: amoi, awak tau apa awak sudah buat?
s: saya tau, sorry, saya rasa saya tak salah sepenuhnya. apa awak nak sekarang
m: amoi, awak turun dari kereta sekarang dan cakap dengan saya.
s: saya tak nak. apa yang awak nak cakap, cakapsaja macam ni.
m: amoi, saya orang baik
s: mana saya tau awak orang baik ke tak. saya tak kenal awak. cakap saja macam ni.
m: ok, moi. awak langgar kereta saya serius ni. saya nak awak bagi nombor ic dan alamat rumah awak kat saya. nanti saya baiki kat bengkel dan awak pergi bayar.
s: saya tak nak. awak bukannya polis atau sesiapa, awak tak berhak mengambil particular saya.
m: habis awak nak macam mana?
s: saya bagi nombor hp saya kat awak. itu saja.
m: mana saya atu awak tipu saya ke tak?
s: saya janji saya akan pergi bayar
m: eh, amoi, babi betul la. saya tak percaya kat awak la
s: saya pun tak percaya kat awak juga
m: habis awak nak macam mana
s: either saya bagi nombor hp saya kat awak, awak pergi baiki dan saya bayar. kalau awak tak nak, saya pun tak boleh buat apa apa.
I quickly negotiate with my friend. She told me to give them whatever they want. But, I said they have no right to have my ic number and my particular. Both of the malay guys kept on pushing us and I told them to hold on as I made calls to ask some male friends to come to the scene to help me as both of us are girls and it's very dangerous to talk to 2 strangers like that.
I took quite some time for my friends to come to give me a hand. At the same time, I was contacting a Bangi friend to ask for the police station's number and hope that some police officers would come to settle everything.
Police officer: p
me: s
s: police station ke ni?
p: ya
s: saya involved dalam satu accident. bolehkah encik datang ke tempat kejadian sekarang dan settle problem ni?
p: sila ke balai polis kajang
s: apa? encik tak boleh order beberapa officer datang ke sini ke?
p: awak pergi saja ke balai polis kajang
s: ok
I just hung up the phone. Idiot and stupid police officer. Wouldn't it be better if some police officers come and settle the problem on the spot.
m: amoi, saya orang serdang. kita pergi ke balai polis serdang saja
s: tapi police tu panggil saya pergi ke balai kajang
m: awak tau jalan ke?
s: tunggu kawan saya datang dulu nanti kita pergi
m: settle kat sini saja la moi
s: saya hanya boleh bagi awak nombor hp saya
m: mana boleh. nanti awak lari??
s: kalau macam tu, kita pergi balai saja
m: babi betul la
Then , both of the malay guys went back to their car and I waited in my car with my friend
s: can you call someone else to come?
a: let me call nyap
s: ok, be fast
a: nyap is not here. let me call my senior
s: whatever
a: he doesn't pick up phone
s: so how?
a: i call jun ming
s: okok
After a few moments,
a: he's coming
s: you think he can handle this?
a: i dont know
s: let me call gen hong
a: okok
After we made calls, we got gen hong and jun ming. But it seemed like they are taking forever to reach the scene
m: lamanya kawan awak
s: tunggu la kejap
m: eh, cepatlah, jangan buang masa la
s: awak nak settle problem kan, tunggu la. saya banyak masa, kalau awak suntuk masa, awak pergi dulu la. saya tak kisah
m: jangan tipu saya, kawan awak nak datang ke?
s: ya. kalau saya nak tipu awak, takkan saya berada kat sini lagi. saya dah pergi awal awal la
m: lah, babi betul la
After a while, jun ming finally arrived. I don't know what he said to them. My friend went down along to listen to them. After a few minutes, gen hong came. He straight away went to them and talked. I was shouting, can anyone please listen to me. I wanted to get out of the car. To my surprise, I couldn't opened the door. It must have been the collision just now.
After a while, jun ming and gen hong came back to me.
gen hong: g
Jun ming: j
s: how?
g: what you wanna do now?
s: i think i wanna report
g: i think it's your fault
s: it's not totally my fault
g: no matter how, the malay would still help the malay
j: ya
s: then, he want my ic and my particular
g: then ar, depends on you lo
My sister and her friend came
my sister: sis
her friend: kh
s: ah jie
sis: how? come out la
s: i couldn't
sis: use the other side
s: okok
We went to the malay guy
m: sekarang amoi ni langgar saya
sis: sekarang kita tak boleh determine siapa yang salah. kita report saja
m: prosedur banyak la
sis: tak apa .kita tak kisah
kh: sekarang kita pergi dulu kat balai
m: settle kat sini je la
sis: tak pa, prosedur banyak. kita ada banyak masa
kh: ya la. kita pergi balai dulu
m:kalau kena bayar, awak bayar semua
kh: mana boleh. kita tengok polis cakap siapa salah
m: mana boleh
s: kita pergi balai dulu. awak cakap awak suntuk masa kan. cepatlah, pergi balai
m: awak tau jalan?
s: tau
then, i asked genhong and jun ming to go back first. I ask my friend to follow jun ming to go home first. My sis and her friend and I headed towards balai polis in bangi. the police officer said we can only fill the forms there and we still need to go to balai kajang to report again. then , we go to balai kajang. the malay guy were so pissed off and shouting at us and asked us to get on our ass. Gosh, so rude.
To my surprise, my friend and Jun ming came to give support. I was so touched. After about one hour of talking to police officers, taking some photos finally, we came to a conclusion. The seargent said that it was my fault and I need to pay RM 200 for the offence(break akta 10- mengganggu trafik). I was like, what. Ok, whatever. And i pay everything and the malay guy pay nothing. Fine!!!!
m: puas hati tak sekarang
s: awak biarkan saya la. bukannya awak yang bayar
sis: sudah settle kan sekarang, then ok la, nak cakap banyak lagi buat apa.
Then, we just went back. I feel so innocent but whatever. I come out with a conclusion now.
a) malay would help the malay no matter what
b) whatever happen, don't ever give your particulars and ic number to others. It's top secret
c) friends nd family are always the best
d) be grateful and thankful to the Lord no matter what happen
e) don't get intimidated by others no matter what happen, if they scold you, scold them back.
f) don't be panic. stay cool and steady
g) report to police whenever you meet an accident
After everything that had happened, I didn't cry at all. wow, I am so brave and super. Biggest lesson so far in my life.
When the malay guys approached me, I was quite panic and tried my best to negotiate with them (I only lowered down the window beside the driver's seat). They demanded me to get out of the car. But I insisted to stay in my car. They kept on ordering me to get out of my car and I insisted to stay in the car. This is some part of our conversation:
Malay Guy and his friend : m
Me: s
My friend who was in the car with me: a
m: amoi, awak tau apa awak sudah buat?
s: saya tau, sorry, saya rasa saya tak salah sepenuhnya. apa awak nak sekarang
m: amoi, awak turun dari kereta sekarang dan cakap dengan saya.
s: saya tak nak. apa yang awak nak cakap, cakapsaja macam ni.
m: amoi, saya orang baik
s: mana saya tau awak orang baik ke tak. saya tak kenal awak. cakap saja macam ni.
m: ok, moi. awak langgar kereta saya serius ni. saya nak awak bagi nombor ic dan alamat rumah awak kat saya. nanti saya baiki kat bengkel dan awak pergi bayar.
s: saya tak nak. awak bukannya polis atau sesiapa, awak tak berhak mengambil particular saya.
m: habis awak nak macam mana?
s: saya bagi nombor hp saya kat awak. itu saja.
m: mana saya atu awak tipu saya ke tak?
s: saya janji saya akan pergi bayar
m: eh, amoi, babi betul la. saya tak percaya kat awak la
s: saya pun tak percaya kat awak juga
m: habis awak nak macam mana
s: either saya bagi nombor hp saya kat awak, awak pergi baiki dan saya bayar. kalau awak tak nak, saya pun tak boleh buat apa apa.
I quickly negotiate with my friend. She told me to give them whatever they want. But, I said they have no right to have my ic number and my particular. Both of the malay guys kept on pushing us and I told them to hold on as I made calls to ask some male friends to come to the scene to help me as both of us are girls and it's very dangerous to talk to 2 strangers like that.
I took quite some time for my friends to come to give me a hand. At the same time, I was contacting a Bangi friend to ask for the police station's number and hope that some police officers would come to settle everything.
Police officer: p
me: s
s: police station ke ni?
p: ya
s: saya involved dalam satu accident. bolehkah encik datang ke tempat kejadian sekarang dan settle problem ni?
p: sila ke balai polis kajang
s: apa? encik tak boleh order beberapa officer datang ke sini ke?
p: awak pergi saja ke balai polis kajang
s: ok
I just hung up the phone. Idiot and stupid police officer. Wouldn't it be better if some police officers come and settle the problem on the spot.
m: amoi, saya orang serdang. kita pergi ke balai polis serdang saja
s: tapi police tu panggil saya pergi ke balai kajang
m: awak tau jalan ke?
s: tunggu kawan saya datang dulu nanti kita pergi
m: settle kat sini saja la moi
s: saya hanya boleh bagi awak nombor hp saya
m: mana boleh. nanti awak lari??
s: kalau macam tu, kita pergi balai saja
m: babi betul la
Then , both of the malay guys went back to their car and I waited in my car with my friend
s: can you call someone else to come?
a: let me call nyap
s: ok, be fast
a: nyap is not here. let me call my senior
s: whatever
a: he doesn't pick up phone
s: so how?
a: i call jun ming
s: okok
After a few moments,
a: he's coming
s: you think he can handle this?
a: i dont know
s: let me call gen hong
a: okok
After we made calls, we got gen hong and jun ming. But it seemed like they are taking forever to reach the scene
m: lamanya kawan awak
s: tunggu la kejap
m: eh, cepatlah, jangan buang masa la
s: awak nak settle problem kan, tunggu la. saya banyak masa, kalau awak suntuk masa, awak pergi dulu la. saya tak kisah
m: jangan tipu saya, kawan awak nak datang ke?
s: ya. kalau saya nak tipu awak, takkan saya berada kat sini lagi. saya dah pergi awal awal la
m: lah, babi betul la
After a while, jun ming finally arrived. I don't know what he said to them. My friend went down along to listen to them. After a few minutes, gen hong came. He straight away went to them and talked. I was shouting, can anyone please listen to me. I wanted to get out of the car. To my surprise, I couldn't opened the door. It must have been the collision just now.
After a while, jun ming and gen hong came back to me.
gen hong: g
Jun ming: j
s: how?
g: what you wanna do now?
s: i think i wanna report
g: i think it's your fault
s: it's not totally my fault
g: no matter how, the malay would still help the malay
j: ya
s: then, he want my ic and my particular
g: then ar, depends on you lo
My sister and her friend came
my sister: sis
her friend: kh
s: ah jie
sis: how? come out la
s: i couldn't
sis: use the other side
s: okok
We went to the malay guy
m: sekarang amoi ni langgar saya
sis: sekarang kita tak boleh determine siapa yang salah. kita report saja
m: prosedur banyak la
sis: tak apa .kita tak kisah
kh: sekarang kita pergi dulu kat balai
m: settle kat sini je la
sis: tak pa, prosedur banyak. kita ada banyak masa
kh: ya la. kita pergi balai dulu
m:kalau kena bayar, awak bayar semua
kh: mana boleh. kita tengok polis cakap siapa salah
m: mana boleh
s: kita pergi balai dulu. awak cakap awak suntuk masa kan. cepatlah, pergi balai
m: awak tau jalan?
s: tau
then, i asked genhong and jun ming to go back first. I ask my friend to follow jun ming to go home first. My sis and her friend and I headed towards balai polis in bangi. the police officer said we can only fill the forms there and we still need to go to balai kajang to report again. then , we go to balai kajang. the malay guy were so pissed off and shouting at us and asked us to get on our ass. Gosh, so rude.
To my surprise, my friend and Jun ming came to give support. I was so touched. After about one hour of talking to police officers, taking some photos finally, we came to a conclusion. The seargent said that it was my fault and I need to pay RM 200 for the offence(break akta 10- mengganggu trafik). I was like, what. Ok, whatever. And i pay everything and the malay guy pay nothing. Fine!!!!
m: puas hati tak sekarang
s: awak biarkan saya la. bukannya awak yang bayar
sis: sudah settle kan sekarang, then ok la, nak cakap banyak lagi buat apa.
Then, we just went back. I feel so innocent but whatever. I come out with a conclusion now.
a) malay would help the malay no matter what
b) whatever happen, don't ever give your particulars and ic number to others. It's top secret
c) friends nd family are always the best
d) be grateful and thankful to the Lord no matter what happen
e) don't get intimidated by others no matter what happen, if they scold you, scold them back.
f) don't be panic. stay cool and steady
g) report to police whenever you meet an accident
After everything that had happened, I didn't cry at all. wow, I am so brave and super. Biggest lesson so far in my life.
March 5, 2007
fasting and prayer
Jeremiah 17:9
The heart is deceitful above all things,
And desperately wicked;
Who can know it?
The heart is deceitful above all things,
And desperately wicked;
Who can know it?
Today is the first day of fasting and prayer. I found that my heart has too many desires and is very sinful. So, I decided to have a week of fasting and prayer. I hope that Lord will bless me and cleanses my heart and renew my spirit. I deeply hope that everything may be easy for me and I can manage to 'bertahan' til one week.
March 3, 2007
to AH GAL
Ah Gal and meI've read your blog and found out that you still cannot forget him. Gal, it's time to move on. There's no point to wait for this unfaithful guy anymore. Keep on with you life, enjoy your life and don't suffer yourself because of him. I want you to know that I'll always support you no matter what. You can talk to me whenever you need a friend and I'll always be there for you. Both of us are busy and we don't get to see and talk to each other everyday but I'm still concerned about you even though we are at two very different places. No matter what happen, I'm still your friend, a close friend.
busy weeks
According to lunar month, today is the second last day of Chinese New Year, but the thing is, the mood of celebrating Chinese New Year is gone. I start studying on third day of CNY as i have three papers (Reactor, Statistics and Organic Chemistry) coming straight up after CNY. I still have another two papers (Statistics and Organic Chemistry) next week. It was kind of disappointment to me that although I've read thoroughly the chapters that were to be tested in exam, I couldn't really do well in that paper. I slack in the first question, and the first question happened to be exactly the same question in my tutorial. I did that tutorial on my own and I just couldn't understand why I couldn't answer it. My lecturer said the first question was a bonus for everyone of us and whoever couldn't it means he or she doesn't take the tutorial questions seriously. Excuse me, i was like... what? I did all the questions on my own, spending days to figure out how to do all those super difficult questions. It doesn't feel good. I was thinking what's the purpose of studying so hard during CNY and I couldn't answer questions well. I mean there were loads of doubt in my answers. Sigh...Life is not easy.
Another disappointment happened when i realize that most of my coursemates are in the dean list while I'm not. I did work hard for the past semesters and I worked real hard. I did all the tutorial questions on my own, studied for all the quizzes and exams and the fact is that I still couldn't get good results. I put extra hard works in all the group works, working twice the load others had worked and I still didn't get what I am supposed to get. There's another integrated project awaiting to be done and I am grouped with the same ol' members again. Other group members don't seem to care about the project. Procrastinating in everything they do, giving me excuses that there's still loads of time before the due date. It will end up the same like last project, ending up in me doing everything, editing, typing (I typed 90% of the project), finding the flow diagram and got it to be printed. No one ever realised what I have done and for sure they'll complain whenever I've done something wrong, even minor mistakes.
I'm still struggling now to finish studying my organic chemistry and statistics. Having to memorise all the formulas and reaction mechanism really burdened me immensely. I'd planned to go to church today as I 've not been there for a couple of weeks. I found out that they were practising for sketch for the coming Indonesia mission trip and thought that I would be of no use even if I went so I decided not to go. Better keep on with my studies and doing some research for the project. I really hope that I can push myself into the dean list this semester. I'm gonna keep my finger crossed. Hope that He will pick me up whenever I feel weary or restless or when I'm down. I really need loads of strength from Him as I need to carry out my responsibility well and at the same time give a good personal testimony to others especially those non-Christian. Be with me Lord and let me hang on to You.
Another disappointment happened when i realize that most of my coursemates are in the dean list while I'm not. I did work hard for the past semesters and I worked real hard. I did all the tutorial questions on my own, studied for all the quizzes and exams and the fact is that I still couldn't get good results. I put extra hard works in all the group works, working twice the load others had worked and I still didn't get what I am supposed to get. There's another integrated project awaiting to be done and I am grouped with the same ol' members again. Other group members don't seem to care about the project. Procrastinating in everything they do, giving me excuses that there's still loads of time before the due date. It will end up the same like last project, ending up in me doing everything, editing, typing (I typed 90% of the project), finding the flow diagram and got it to be printed. No one ever realised what I have done and for sure they'll complain whenever I've done something wrong, even minor mistakes.
I'm still struggling now to finish studying my organic chemistry and statistics. Having to memorise all the formulas and reaction mechanism really burdened me immensely. I'd planned to go to church today as I 've not been there for a couple of weeks. I found out that they were practising for sketch for the coming Indonesia mission trip and thought that I would be of no use even if I went so I decided not to go. Better keep on with my studies and doing some research for the project. I really hope that I can push myself into the dean list this semester. I'm gonna keep my finger crossed. Hope that He will pick me up whenever I feel weary or restless or when I'm down. I really need loads of strength from Him as I need to carry out my responsibility well and at the same time give a good personal testimony to others especially those non-Christian. Be with me Lord and let me hang on to You.
February 25, 2007
February 14, 2007
February 9, 2007
SAM
I found that an organic compound called S-adenosyl methionine is also named SAM. SAM...that's my surname, my famous name, the name that my friends used to called me nowadays. I feel so proud!!!
Allow me to explain further what's is S-adenosyl methionine all about.
SAM is a biological compound involved in methyl group transfers and is present in all living cells. SAM was discovered in 1952(it's older than me).The reactions that produce, consume and regenerate SAM are called the SAM cycle.(wow!i have my own cycle). SAM is required for celullar growth and repair(wow!i'm that important ar..hihi).
SAM is an extraordinarily expensive supplement at present(i'm so expensive and valuable). Below is the structure of SAM.(of course i'm better looking than a few bonds between C, N, H and oxygen...haha)
February 5, 2007
silly husband, smart wife
husband:
how would you release your anger everytime you quarrel with me?
wife:
oh, i would go wash the toilet bowl.
husband:
oh, doing housework is a good way to release your anger, you think...
wife:
yes, absolutely. it always does when i wash the toilet bowl with your toothbrush
how would you release your anger everytime you quarrel with me?
wife:
oh, i would go wash the toilet bowl.
husband:
oh, doing housework is a good way to release your anger, you think...
wife:
yes, absolutely. it always does when i wash the toilet bowl with your toothbrush
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