I miss you…

Life. What is life all about? What’s the purpose of living on this earth? What’s the point of working so hard in this life? What’s the significance of perseverance to achieve something big in this life? Why do we have to work hard and study hard? Someday soon, we will leave the earth. No matter how hard we keep this life, we will still lose it someday. No matter how hard we work, how hard we study, we cannot bring all of these together with us when we leave the earth. So why, why do we take all of these seriously in our lives? What is it that we are looking for in this life? Something we can boast about? Something to be proud of? Something to show off to others? This life really perplexes me. I still couldn’t find the meaning of this life no matter how hard I’ve tried. Life is so vague. I still couldn’t get the big picture of it no matter how hard I’ve seek.


I guess losing someone close to me recently makes me think more about this life. I’ve lost him, for eternity. He will never come back to me again. I miss him a lot lately. I wanted to talk to him but I couldn’t. Losing him really give a tremendous impact on my life. Not only me, but also to the people around me. I’ll do anything to get him back in my life but I know there’s nothing I can do. I was such a fool who didn’t know how to cherish him while he’s still around. I was such an idiot to make him worried about me while he’s around. I am such a pain. God, why are You so cruel? You took him away from me. You didn’t even give me a chance to say goodbye. You didn’t even give me a chance to pay him back for all the good deeds he did to me. You didn’t even give him a chance to say goodbye. He had just started to enjoy his life and You just took him away without a warning. You said You have a perfect plan for everyone but is this what You called a perfect plan for him? This is so absurd. Why are You so cruel? You promised to give me a joyful life but do I have now? Only pain, in my heart. My heart aches whenever I think of him.


You were the one to support me when everyone else turned their back against me. You were the first one to come to me whenever I faced problems. You worked hard for me, to give me a comfortable life and to give me the best in not just anything, but everything in my life. You were the one to console me whenever I was depressed. You are everything in my life. I still want you in my life. I am so regret for I didn’t obey you fully. I was so stupid for I did not comprehend what you did in the past.


Nothing can replace you in my life. You are the most important person in my life. You are gone, for eternity and I will miss you forever…